How Does a Young Pastor Minister to Senior Adults

To senior adults, I’m a young pastor—but I used to be much younger!  I’m 43 years old, having been in ministry since I was 20 as a music and youth pastor; and I’ve served as a senior/lead pastor since I was 31.  I’ve shared this before, but I’ve actually had people when I first started in senior pastoral ministry tell me they had a hard time staying at church because they felt a child was preaching to them.  Now that I’m in my 40s, I don’t get that I’m the age of my members’ grandchildren anymore, but their children?  Sure!  I wonder when the tipping point will come?  Probably when I start getting my AARP mail in a little over a decade (yikes!).

How does a young pastor minister adequately to those who are the age of parents and grandparents?

  1. Acknowledge and embrace your age.  Some will look down on you because of your youth—something that Timothy experienced (1 Timothy 4:12).   Like anything, you can allow your age to hold you hostage, thinking you have nothing to contribute.
  2. Age does not equal maturity.  John Piper once said that you can be spiritually pimply-face at 80 years of age.  Just because you are a young pastor does not mean you’re immature. Just because you are older does not mean your maturity is a given. Paul mentored Timothy and the church ordained him at a young age due to his maturity in the faith. But he lacked years, which caused him to operate in fear.
  3. Relish ministering to and with those older than you.  For the first few years of ministry for me, the only ones younger than I were in youth ministry.  I didn’t know anything about, well, anything.  While some let me know that I didn’t know much, others took me under their wing and show me the ropes (and how those ropes got under those wings, I’ll never know!). 
  4. Treat those older than you with respect, like fathers and mothers—especially when it comes to change.  Interestingly, Paul tells Timothy, “Do not rebuke an older man but encourage him as you would a father.  Treat younger men like brothers, older women like mothers, younger women like sisters, in all purity” (1 Timothy 5:1-2).  Just because we are in the position of pastoral authority, does not give us the leverage to treat others with contempt, especially those who are older than us.  Condescension is unbecoming a young pastor.  Respect!  Encourage him as you would your dad.  Now there’s some perspective!
  5. God is ‘older’ that all of us put together—so preach, speak, think, and live His Word.  Pastors are to set an example in life, love, faith, speech, and purity (1 Timothy 4:12).  No matter your age, experiences, or the context in which God places you—preach His Word, in season and out of season (2 Timothy 4:2).  All Christians of all ages, whether they realize it or not, yearn for the Word.  All people need to hear the Word.  So preach the Word, love your people, respectfully lead in areas that need change, carefully and prayerfully lead them to remove those obstacles—but only as the Word makes clear. And go at the speed of God (thanks for that, Dave Howeth). 

What are some things you as pastors have learned in pastoring those older than you? 

How an Episode of Columbo Feeds Our Christian Walk

Thanks to ME-TV (Memorable Entertainment Television), our children now get to watch some clean, classic television with some really good storylines.  One of my favorite shows was Columbo.  Peter Falk played him to perfection.  He always had “one more thing” to ask a suspect before he left a scene.  He looked rather disheveled and unkempt, but the writing and his portrayal of this unorthodox detective was, in its day, must see TV.

Yet, what made this show distinct was this: they always showed the crime and ‘whodunnit’ in the first 5-7 minutes.  Usually, the audience is left guessing as to the murderer.  Here, we know how it will end, but we spend our time wondering how Columbo will solve the case.

In Scripture, we know ‘whodunnit’ and how it will end.  But we spend our time wondering how our Heavenly Father will work it all out.  Admittedly, this is where the analogy breaks down.  None of the offenses committed against humanity, and ultimately against Himself (Psalm 51:4), catch God by surprise.  We have no Plan A, B, C, or D’.  What we have is a God in heaven working it all out, with the mystery being how God will bring His perfect and ultimate plan to fruition. 

Like the show, we know God will make it happen. 

But unlike Columbo, God is never in the dark—even though we may be. 

Rest your head tonight knowing that God will bring all things to His decided ends!  And if you are in Christ, rest knowing that God holds all that is in the hollow of his hands (see Isaiah 40). 

Say to Archippus, Say to All of Us: Fulfill Your Ministry

On December 1st, I will celebrate (yes, celebrate) three years as lead pastor at Arapahoe Road Baptist Church.  This time of year always gets me thinking about where God has taken me in ministry.  When God called me into the ministry in 1992 (I was 20 1/2), I had no idea where that call would take me, but it sure came in interesting—often painful—stages to get me to where He’d have me.  The biggest place he’d have me venture is the path from significant pride to continued humbling.  It took a while to find God’s place for me—but if we humbly present ourselves to God, He will show us the ministry He’s called us to fulfill.

I learned painful but positive lessons over the years, mostly about myself.  Regardless of what arises in churches and in life, I have found that I am often my own worst enemy.  But thankfully, God is still working in me, saying to me as He said to Archippus, “Fulfill your ministry” (Colossians 4:17). 

A little history, if you will.

My Pleasureville Years.  From 1995-1998, I was a full-time seminary student at Southern Seminary and a part-time music minister at Pleasureville Baptist Church in Henry County, Kentucky.  I was a mostly-city boy in a farming community.  I’d learn Bach, Vivaldi, and Chopin by day, then try to lead worship and children’s choir on the weekends.  The conservatory-model training I had in college and seminary made the connection tough—I just didn’t know how to be non-academic in how I talked and led.  I was just about to get the hang of it by the time I left in March 1998.  I learned I had to speak the language of the people, not of academics. Fulfill your ministry by being clear and talking to your people, not at or over them. 

My Clewiston Years (1998-2001):  After I left seminary, I was called as Minister of Music and Youth at First Baptist Church, Clewiston, Florida.  This were pivotal, wonderful years for me.  We had a great mix of older and younger demographics.  I was 26, not only leading worship, but direction youth, adult, and senior adult choirs, overseeing preschool and children’s choirs, all the while being their youth pastor. 

My first six to nine months were some growing pains.  They were used to musicals, and I had never directed a musical.  My predecessor, Joe Glass, was very skilled at these things, and set the bar very high.  I didn’t know what I was doing.  It was then that God brought along Sean Scheffler, who knew how to direct dramas (and to throw a killer lock-in, by the way), so he began to direct while I directed the music—and it was a wonderful partnership.  It was there I learned that I didn’t have all the answers, but God would provide others in the church to help advance the Kingdom—thus helping them fulfill their ministry as well.

Halfway through my tenure there, God called me into the preaching ministry.  Having seen what struggles pastors went through, I did not embrace this.  Sure, I loved preaching (as green as I was), but I knew preaching wasn’t pastoring.  Could I lead and connect and love people—even those who disagreed with me?  It was there I realized that when God calls you to fulfill a ministry, he will relentlessly pursue you until you surrender.  So, in 2001 I surrendered.  I announced it with tears to my church that I adored in April 2001 with my last Sunday being  in June. 

My Cox’s Creek Year (2001-2002).  I served for seven months at a church back in Kentucky that was just a poor fit.  And sometimes, you just don’t know until you’re there.  I followed a youth pastor that was a rah-rah guy who had 70 kids at this little church on Wednesday nights.  I was just a rah guy.  When he left, most of them left.  They had expectations, I didn’t fulfill them.  But, remember, God called me to preach.  I ran, he pursued.  I was at that church, again, as a music and youth guy.  That wasn’t what God called me to do.   I realized that being outside of what God calls you to do is not obeying His call to fulfill ministry

My Highview Baptist Spring (2002).  After leaving that little church, I went and played piano at Highview Baptist Church in Louisville for a few months.  Had God called me into music ministry, this was a dream.  A band, 12 piece orchestra, 50 voice choir, and serving under a veteran music minister named Bob Johnson—it was wonderful.  It paid little, but it paid while I was looking for another ministry—but what?  As much as I loved it there and as much as I loved listening to Kevin Ezell and Hershael York preach, I was restless until I fulfill the ministry God laid on me.  I soon took another church.

My English Year.  At 30 years old, back at seminary finishing my MDiv, I took a church in Breckinridge County, Kentucky:  English Baptist Church.  A tiny, 25-30 member Baptist church surrounded by Mennonites.  What a great group of believers!  Our family of three drove 100 miles one way to preach and minister at that church over the weekends.  We conducted the first VBS there in four years; we had our first baptism there in at least three; we met a Lottie Moon goal of $500 with $575!  You might say like others did, “They could find a preacher anywhere—why should you go there?”  This was the ministry God called me to fulfill, and God had humbled me enough to say, “OK, Lord—where?  Here?  Yes, Lord—I will follow!” 

My Boone’s Creek Years (2003-2011):  This church, Boone’s Creek Baptist Church outside of Lexington, Kentucky, that’s 229 years old was the first church God called me to as a full-time pastor.  I was 31—a month shy of 32.  A child!  A child leading people old enough to be my grandparents.  I understand why Paul told Timothy not to have a spirit of fear (2 Timothy 1:7).  I listened to my first sermons there.  Hoo, boy.  In finding my voice, I would try to be funny like Driscoll (but that came off goofy), passionate like Piper (but folks told me I sounded angry), thick like MacArthur (but I’d lose them because, well, I’m not MacArthur).  It wasn’t until 2005 that God gave me the voice He had for me. 

But all along the way, I tried to heed the advice of other pastors who said, “Preach the Word, love the people, don’t change much at the beginning.  Then they will trust you when change is needed down the road.”  And God gave me eight wonderful years.  We contributed to helping a church plant in Hazard, we took our first international missions trips—in this case, to Trinidad and Tobago.  But even more, I have friendships that will last a lifetime that I will always treasure.  When I left Boone’s Creek in 2011, I had a special called meeting with my deacons.  One of them named Leonard said something I’ll never forget:  “Bro. Matt, everything you did, you backed it up with the Word of God.  I’ll always be grateful and I’ll never forget.”  I realized that in fulfilling the ministry God gives, if you don’t love the people where they are and given them the Word where they are, you won’t be able to take them or the church where they need to be. 

My Colorado Years (2011-?): So, here I am at Arapahoe Road Baptist Church in South Denver.  All of those lessons I’ve learned in previous chapters have come into play.  But even here, God is stirring and making me sense that this chapter will look markedly different from the previous ones.  Serving with people that are more and more buying in to reaching our neighbors and turning ARBC into a Great Commission missions hub is a venture I love leading and loving them through.  I’m serving with very Kingdom minded men on staff, in our association, and with our state convention.  I dream of setting up groups in our communities through our Sunday School and long to plant a church in an area that needs a gospel witness here.  I trust God’s Word and His Spirit will stir the spirit of our people, as He’s always promised to do.  I’m learning all over to seek His face and to fulfill the gospel ministry He’s given me and us at ARBC in Denver. 

To be continued…

From the Rising to the Setting of the Sun? Is God Really Worthy of Praise?

At all points and at all times, regardless of whatever situations or circumstances you may find yourself, we praise the Lord! 

At all points and at all times?  This sounds almost ludicrous—as ludicrous as James 1:2 when the Spirit-inspired Word tells us to count it all joy in our trials and sufferings.  We work to avoid the hardships, but those hardships will not avoid us, because God is working something out for our good and for His glory, dear Christian. 

Some of you are reading this now and wondering, “Sure, you can say this from your vantage point.  You have no idea what I’m going through—and it sure isn’t something over which I’m praising God.  Get back into your office and your books and let us deal with reality.”  Been there, done that, bought the T-shirt.  But here’s what I know.

God stirs within us and moves those around us to get us in the position and the place to where He’s called us.  We may not see it now, but His promises in His Word as true that for the believer “God works all things together for good” (Romans 8:28).  He doesn’t work all things according to what we see are good, but He’s working things to promote His good and for our good in Him. 

Dear Christian, let’s move from theory to reality!  Take His promise our for a test drive.  You may not see this on the road directly ahead, but God knows what’s over the hill and around the corner and He’s taking you where you need to go for His glory and our good.  Will we trust Him behind the wheel?

Forgiving Those Who Sin Differently Than I Do

I came across this choice quote in a book I’m reading called Crucial Conversations: Tools for Talking When the Stakes are High:

A rather clever person once [said] in the form of a prayer, “Lord, help me to forgive those who sin differently than I do.”  When we recognize that we all have weaknesses, it’s easier to find a way to respect others.  When we do this, we feel a kinship or a mutuality between ourselves and even the thorniest of people.  This sense of kinship and connection to others helps create Mutual Respect and eventually enables us to stay in dialogue with virtually anyone.

That prayer captures the crux of the matter in our relationships, doesn’t it?  We grow used to our sins, but we scratch our heads at those who struggle with sins different from ours. We wonder, “How could someone be involved with that?”  Others, however, may look at us the same way.

Granted, the prayer is flawed–we don’t forgive sins others commit in general, but only those who have committed those sins against us.  It reminds us of the parable where the publican rejoiced in his status before God and that he wasn’t a ‘sinner’ like this tax collector.  He didn’t believe he needed mercy, while the tax collector knew he needed God’s mercy to have any hope of forgiveness (see Luke 18:9-14).

When we realize we are sinners in need of a Savior and His daily grace to overcome the flesh, we look at others who are on the journey to take those next steps in Christ as well.  And it’s a needed tonic for any moral superiority that you may have toward anyone else.

And praise God for that tonic!

Fellow Churches are Kingdom Partners, Not Competitors

We need to see fellow, like-minded, Gospel-centered, Word-driven, Christ-exalting churches as partners, not competitors.

This past Sunday, my family and I took a stay-cation and visited a church in the area.  I was due some Sunday vacation time, plus it was my wife’s birthday, so we decided to worship with the saints at Cornerstone Church in Lone Tree, CO.  Mike Atherton, the lead pastor at Cornerstone, is a good friend with whom I serve in the trenches in state convention work, along with other endeavors in our city’s Baptist association.  They have an impressive facility: a place to get coffee, nice children’s check-in, and even a fireplace–helpful on a single-digit-temperature morning!

But when it comes right down to it, it’s all about worshipers coming together, singing to the Lord, encouraging each other, and hearing the Word, and reaching the community creatively, consistently, and intentionally.  I’m thankful for such a gospel partner.

I make a big deal out of this because I haven’t always seen fellow churches in places where I’ve ministered as partners.  I’ve sometimes seen them as competitors.  When I was a youth pastor in South Florida, God allowed it to grow from about 15 kids to 50.  But I’d look at the church up the road and they brought in over 100 kids.  Sure, we had a basketball goal and an open field.  But they had ping-pong, video games, TVs, the works.  And yes, while we made some adjustments, our youth ministry couldn’t pull their numbers.

And I began to realize that that’s OK.  Was that church teaching the gospel?  Yes.  Were kids coming to Christ?  Yes, they seemed to be from my vantage point.  Then, that’s a Kingdom partner, not a Kingdom competitor.

It was then that God started a maturing process that I’m grateful for to this day.  Cornerstone runs twice as many as my church, has Upwards, a sweet new facility, and more.  Another church nearby have three services, run 3-4 times our count, and are planting other churches.  Fifteen years ago when I was early in ministry and more insecure with who I was in Christ, I would look at them with envy and say, “I wish we could be like them!”  There’s a danger.

One, God brought me to my church, and as for me, I couldn’t be happier with the people with whom He’s called me to serve.

Secondly, God has called us to be the most faithful Arapahoe Road Baptist Church, not a copy of another.  Sure, those other churches are churches to learn from and emulate in their gospel faithfulness, but our aim is not for us to say, “Let’s be like them because they are awesome!”  The goal is to say, “Thank you, Lord, for those partners–now let’s work to where we may be a faithful example and Kingdom partner to others.”

Do you have a story about seeing other churches as competitors?  Are you still struggling with that, or has God brought you through?  Share your story in the comments section.

Thanks again, Mike, for your hospitality and warm welcome at Cornerstone.  Give us South Denver, or we die!